My partner threatened to divorce me when I said I'd give our daughter a silly name. So I called her Bluff.
My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Did I tell you the joke about amnesia? No really, did I? I can't remember.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops? Guardians of the Galaxy.